age/women

[Dova80]

Originally Posted by The Chi

Interesting thread...thanks my lovely gents for the very sweet compliments, Ebbs I love you too hunny!

1) What may I ask is wrong with tattoos?

While it may not be your preference of art, today it is mainstream and is a true form of self expression. And yes, I have 3 to be exact, and hope to have more. I try to keep mine tasteful, but they are to MY taste, and honestly, anyone who has a problem with them, its just that. THEIR problem. If you met me on the street, youd never know I have my ink.

If your looking for a good woman, try looking further than skin deep. True beauty, quality and goodness isnt on the cheap pretty wrapper.

I agree, but I just have a personal preference of women without tattoos. Like I have said I can appreciate the art they are, but long term its not something I want to see. To me having tattos its similar to having a Ferrari, or lamborghini, or whatever exotic car that is appealing to the eyes and then throwing some loud gaudy paint on it which ruins the subtle beauty of the car. Women are beautiful (for the most part) and to me ink takes away from the original beauty. Then there is 30 years down the road whats it going to look like..

Originally Posted by The Chi

2) This whole thing about not looking, whether you believe in it or not, well, its usually the best way to go about it. Honestly. When you are LOOKING, you arent SEEING and people have a tendency to assign the attirbutes or lack thereof to the current flames. Intentional or not, it happens. And once you realize that person isnt what you have made them out to be in your head, the "love is gone" so to speak. Literally.

I seem to have trouble with finding women that meet my initial requirements of no ink, or babies... much less further inspection I dont really look, but if something passes by I do take notice.

Originally Posted by The Chi

3) Try adjusting your outlook a bit. Tho I dont know you, and it may just be the alcohol talking, well, your attitudes towards women seems to be a tad on the "poor" side. Just reading a few lines into your post I was slightly offended, being a woman, by your overall post was slightly demeaning, almost as if you see us as inferior beings who offend you with our ink, our difference in views from yours and our sometimes already having reproduced.

Ink is just a personal thing, I appreciate it for what it is, but I do not want it on my wife. As far as ready made families, I just do not want to have a step father and a step family involved in raising a child.

Originally Posted by The Chi

4) Your BIGGEST problem??

YOUR IN OKLAHOMA!!! Ok, sorry had to. I was born there, I know what Im not missing, and honestly, choosing from candidates that are most likely all from the same gene pool I can see as unappetizing!! I am related to half the state, so I know. Trust me!

And OH YEAH, boys you can clone me, but never forget, there can be only ONE of the genuine RaeRae!

yes I agree living in Oklahoma does not help..

Originally Posted by The Chi

Had to go back and look at your post again, knew I missed a few things!

Where are you looking? You wont find alot of moral fiber, courtesy and sanity in a local dive bar or night club! Try different venues if you insist on looking...and income has nothing to do with it. The poorest man in the world may also be the richest, money ISNT everything.

...try looking for a woman that thinks more like a man. Go ahead, laugh. Ask Ebbs about it. Think code of honor, pride, that kind of thing. I know it sounds odd, but well, it kinda works. Like the other boys mentioned, find a good woman, even if she's attached, and honestly most of her friends will be the same. If she's got any female friends.

I am not really looking but if a woman strikes me as attractive I will go talk to her no matter where we are at. But I also know I will not pick up any decent long term at a bar...

Lately I have been keeping my eyes peeled when I go shopping for food. I do agree with you about thinking like a man, it does help.. but its difficult to find them.

[Mr Lefty]

But you've gotta look at your no ink "policy" and seriously make a decision... you meet someone perfect for you but has a tattoo... is it worth passing that up? and as it's one of your first checks... you wouldn't even know what your missing...


My ex Lei, had several tattoo's when we met... one on her foot, one on her lower pelvis, and the tramp stamp every girl who turned 18 in the 90's has... it was ok with me but I didn't want her to get anymore as, like you, I thought it'd ruin her gorgeous body. she got 3 more basicly covering up her back and one down her arm. horrible in my opinion... but that doesn't change who she was or the fact that I loved her.

the Ink thing is skin deep and I understand you have a preconcieved idea of what your family foto would look like... and your wife doesn't have tats...

but like I said before... you can't control what others do, say or want...

[Mr Lefty]

Originally Posted by Papa_Complex

Geez people, get over the ticking clock. I'm 45 and never married. Got close 20 years ago but fortunately she realized that she was insane, before I did, and walked out on me. Every now and then I run into some girl who was a hottie back in high school or college, who tells me that she had "the biggest crush" on me but for some reason wouldn't give me the time of day back then, and I realize how goddamn lucky I was she didn't.

Too many people these days jump on the "starter marriage" and then split, screwing themselves up for the rest of their lives, both emotionally and financially. Give it a little time, find the right person, and WORK ON IT. Don't walk away when you hit the first snag and don't find out the hard way that the other person snores like a chainsaw, and eats with their toes if you can't take that.

At this point all that I'm seeing available around me are women with tats and pierced navels, who say that they are looking for a cross between Brad Pitt and John the Baptist, but who seem to constantly end up with a cross between Ben Affleck and Attila the Hun with commitment issues. The single guys I know are all looking for a stripper who went to Le Cordon Bleu, and likes to cook all day while wearing nothing but ankle socks. You can only live in a beer commercial, in a beer commercial.

Forget TV and live in the world we have.

honestly... THAT is my problem. I don't date to just date. there has to be some sort of possibility of a long term relationship.

I will get married once. PERIOD. I hate divorces... I think they happen WAY to often for a variety of reasons... but usually because people jump in to them to early... or quit. mostly the latter IMO... not everyone who married in the 30's or 40's was right for each other... nor did they go with out think'n they got into something they weren't ready for... but they made a commitment and stuck to it. now... they quit. and on one hand I can understand, if you realize 5 years down the road, damn this person has changed or really isn't who I thought they were after try'n to make it work. but that's all the more reason to take your time before make'n that jump.

now I'm not condemning anyone who's had a divorce... I could care less what you or anyone has done in their personal lives... that's just how I choose to live my life...

[Rider]

I'm 38, and I see women all the time that I'd like to get with. The only problem I'm married and usually they are too so that kills it right there. The older I get, the more I know exactly what I want in a woman and can usually spot it pretty quick.

[G-Rex]

Dova, I've been exactly where you are, so maybe I can impart some wisdom your way.

Having critera for someone you consider dating material is fine. You need that. We're all picky in our own right. For a long time, I didn't go out with someone because she a) smoked, b) had kids, c) whatever else was on my list. I was pretty particular about these things for a long time. My best friend pointed out to me exactly what Ebbs did to you in this thread. You don't know what you might be missing because you're not even giving them a chance. Basically, what he told me was "You're not necessarily going to marry them. Go out with them." My argument was the same as Ebbs. I didn't want to date unless I could see a possibility for a long term relationship.

Every year, I asked myself "What's the problem?", "Why am I the only one who can't find a girl to love that loves me back?", "Am I really that bad a person?"

Thanks to a few reasons, I realized that some of my criteria was a bit silly for *me*. What did the trick? I'm not sure. I think there were a few factors involved, not the least of which was age. I was definitely where you are when I was in my late 20s/early 30s.

Yet, at 36, almost 37, here I stand engaged to a wonderful woman. If you had asked me at this time last year if I would have guessed I'd be here, I would have laughed and said no. At even 30, I wasn't really ready for kids, and I darned sure didn't want to date a woman that had kids. Again, here I am with Carolina. She has two adorable girls. I love those girls as if they were my own. Besides, they give you those moments that you just can't do anything but get all sappy about and say *awwww*. Last week when I was in Austin, we were sound asleep. I woke up in the middle of night and Alee, the almost 3 yr old, had a bad dream or something, woke up, and came into the bedroom. I woke up with her curled up beside me about half asleep. I can't begin to explain what an amazing moment that was. I've been around the girls for 7+ months now. As Carolina says sarcastically, *It's a good thing they don't like you.*

Now, for the most important part of what I'm going to say. Take every relationship, every friendship, very importantly. Get what you can out of those, as they will play a huge role in the person you become, and the person you let into your life in the future.

[Mr Lefty]

Originally Posted by G-Rex

Dova, I've been exactly where you are, so maybe I can impart some wisdom your way.

Having critera for someone you consider dating material is fine. You need that. We're all picky in our own right. For a long time, I didn't go out with someone because she a) smoked, b) had kids, c) whatever else was on my list. I was pretty particular about these things for a long time. My best friend pointed out to me exactly what Ebbs did to you in this thread. You don't know what you might be missing because you're not even giving them a chance. Basically, what he told me was "You're not necessarily going to marry them. Go out with them." My argument was the same as Ebbs. I didn't want to date unless I could see a possibility for a long term relationship.

Every year, I asked myself "What's the problem?", "Why am I the only one who can't find a girl to love that loves me back?", "Am I really that bad a person?"

Thanks to a few reasons, I realized that some of my criteria was a bit silly for *me*. What did the trick? I'm not sure. I think there were a few factors involved, not the least of which was age. I was definitely where you are when I was in my late 20s/early 30s.

Yet, at 36, almost 37, here I stand engaged to a wonderful woman. If you had asked me at this time last year if I would have guessed I'd be here, I would have laughed and said no. At even 30, I wasn't really ready for kids, and I darned sure didn't want to date a woman that had kids. Again, here I am with Carolina. She has two adorable girls. I love those girls as if they were my own. Besides, they give you those moments that you just can't do anything but get all sappy about and say *awwww*. Last week when I was in Austin, we were sound asleep. I woke up in the middle of night and Alee, the almost 3 yr old, had a bad dream or something, woke up, and came into the bedroom. I woke up with her curled up beside me about half asleep. I can't begin to explain what an amazing moment that was. I've been around the girls for 7+ months now. As Carolina says sarcastically, *It's a good thing they don't like you.*

Now, for the most important part of what I'm going to say. Take every relationship, every friendship, very importantly. Get what you can out of those, as they will play a huge role in the person you become, and the person you let into your life in the future.

I thought someone said it was just cause you wanted to ride the 1098

[G-Rex]

Originally Posted by ebbs15

I thought someone said it was just cause you wanted to ride the 1098

I call that a perk.

[Mr Lefty]

fair enough

[CrazyKell]

Wow! Very rarely do I read an entire thread (at least one that's 10 pages ) but I read this one.

Being single isn't easy. I'm not in your same boat but it's similar.

I think that I'm solid and I think that I deserve someone who's solid as well. Being single in my early 30's isn't easy. I too would prefer someone who didn't have kids or someone who hadn't been divorced already.

I've got other picky little things that I don't like but I'm more flexible about (smoking, etc.).

I think I'm the female version of a lot of you males out there.

Unfortunately for me a lot of guys get intimidated. But the thing is....I don't want a guy who's intimidated by a strong woman.

I want someone who loves me for who I am and not only wants but appreciates a strong woman. I'm smart and not afraid to admit it (but not egotistical about it either. ). I can hold my own, have my own bike, like to drive my car, etc. A lot of guys don't like that. But I'd rather be alone for the rest of my life than have to change fundamentally who I am just to fit someone else's mode of the perfect woman.

Someone will be lucky to have me. And I deserve someone who will appreciate that. I'll know it if/when he comes along.

[Papa_Complex]

Originally Posted by ebbs15

I thought someone said it was just cause you wanted to ride the 1098

Guy had to cover 49 States and 3 or four Provinces to find her, so it better be for more than the bike