Some Funnies...

101lifts2 · 10-25-2009, 01:45 AM

1. I was walking through the cemetery this morning and saw a guy crouching down behind a tombstone. I said, "Morning!" He said, "No, just taking a shit."

2. When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realized that the Lord doesn't work that way, so I stole a bike and asked Him to forgive me.

3. My girlfriend was in labor with our first child. She was shouting, "Get this out of me? Give me the drugs." She then looked at me and said, "You did this to me, you bastard!" I casually replied, "If you would care to remember, I wanted to stick it up your ass, but you said, ‘No, it'll be too painful.’”

4. I went to an extremely attractive female doctor today for my annual checkup. She told me that I had to quit masturbating. I asked why and she told me, "Because I am trying to examine you."

5. I was walking down the street today and saw my Afghani neighbor, Abdul, standing on his fifth floor apartment balcony shaking a carpet. I shouted up to him, "What's up, Abdul, won't it start?"

Rangerscott · 10-25-2009, 02:06 AM

Hahahhahahhhahhaha

psychochild28 · 10-25-2009, 02:08 AM

racedoll · 10-25-2009, 08:33 AM

Loved the last one!

Particle Man · 10-26-2009, 11:04 AM

I'm freakin' rollin' here

LeeNetworX · 10-26-2009, 11:07 AM

Lol @ 3 & 5

ontwo · 10-26-2009, 11:08 AM

Awesome

10-25-2009, 01:45 AM	#1
101lifts2 WSB Champion Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Anaheim, CA Moto: 2009 Kawi ZX6R Posts: 5,570	Some Funnies... 1. I was walking through the cemetery this morning and saw a guy crouching down behind a tombstone. I said, "Morning!" He said, "No, just taking a shit." 2. When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realized that the Lord doesn't work that way, so I stole a bike and asked Him to forgive me. 3. My girlfriend was in labor with our first child. She was shouting, "Get this out of me? Give me the drugs." She then looked at me and said, "You did this to me, you bastard!" I casually replied, "If you would care to remember, I wanted to stick it up your ass, but you said, ‘No, it'll be too painful.’” 4. I went to an extremely attractive female doctor today for my annual checkup. She told me that I had to quit masturbating. I asked why and she told me, "Because I am trying to examine you." 5. I was walking down the street today and saw my Afghani neighbor, Abdul, standing on his fifth floor apartment balcony shaking a carpet. I shouted up to him, "What's up, Abdul, won't it start?" __________________ Train Hard Ron Paul - 2012 Mark of Excellence GM

10-26-2009, 11:04 AM	#5
Particle Man Custom User Title Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Central NY Moto: 2003 SV650S Posts: 14,959	I'm freakin' rollin' here __________________ I'm not "fat." I'm "Enlarged to show texture." Handle every stressful situation like a DOG: If you can't eat it or hump it, pi$$ on it & walk away.

10-25-2009, 02:06 AM	#2
Rangerscott Viff6N Mutated Warrior Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Texas Moto: '01 Honda VFR 800 & '09 ER-6N Posts: 8,704	Hahahhahahhhahhaha

10-25-2009, 02:08 AM	#3
psychochild28 Banned Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: On a bus Moto: SV 650S Posts: 857

10-25-2009, 08:33 AM	#4
racedoll AMA Supersport Join Date: Nov 2008 Moto: '04 Kawasaki ZX6RR Posts: 3,392	Loved the last one!

10-26-2009, 11:07 AM	#6
LeeNetworX SFL Expatriate #1 Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: ATL Burbs Moto: '09 Triumph Speed Triple Posts: 4,712	Lol @ 3 & 5

10-26-2009, 11:08 AM	#7
ontwo Designated Drinker Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: shitville Moto: 2009 ZX6R Posts: 1,661	Awesome