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Old 04-03-2009, 01:39 AM   #21
zed
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Originally Posted by 101lifts2 View Post
Ever consider a woodchipper?
that is so wrong.
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Old 04-03-2009, 08:28 AM   #22
cbrchick
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He wants to be cremated. We're probably going to do a "direct cremation," where his body is taken directly from the house or hospital to the crematory. No embalming, no viewing. My wife and I both agreed that viewing dead family members before burial offers no comfort or closure, especially when they look like wax figures that bear little to no resemblance to the person they once were.

He may have months, weeks, or just days left. The doctors won't say. Since he's homeless, it looks like he'll be coming back to OUR house if he makes it out of the hospital, which should be a real fucking treat considering I have no idea how to care for sickly people. We're trying to get hooked up with a hospice program, but they won't be there with him 24/7.
Sorry you are going through this. It's difficult for everyone especially when important decisions have to be made with end of life care. If your father-in-law is coming home to die, taking care of him really isn't all that difficult b/c being comfortable is the goal. Preparation is key. I imagine if you are going to provide hospice in your home, there are programs there that can help you get organized. I'm not sure what is available b/c I am in Canada.

I think one of the hardest things is going to be the emotional stress with the whole situation. A lot of it I am sure you are dealing with right now. Coming to terms with the diagnosis and treatment/lack there of will be a process. There's lots of information out there on the "dying process". Do a search, you might find it helpful.

Although all this sucks for many involved, you can have the opportunity to help your family have a "good death". I know this sounds morbid to a lot of people, but dying is natural and having personal control over some of it kinda makes this easier. Sometimes there's no dignity in dying in a hospital, attached to monitors and being in pain, holding on the life with futile treatments.

If you guys decide being comfortable and quality of life is the goal, taking him home and providing care can be a wonderful thing.

Anyway, there's lots of information out there.

His course of treatment and likelihood of survival will determine his care. But I think coming home to die is a wonderful thing. But I am a nurse and am willing to do that for my family. It wont be easy, some people can't. And that's totally okay. But you do what you are comfortable with and what you can handle.

Anyway questions, you can always PM.


Keep your spirits up, this can be a long process.

Kirsty
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