Aphasia

askmrjesus · 03-25-2009, 07:36 PM

It all started with Birgit's mother, whom I've never met. Birgit, a friend of my wife, has a mother that makes one of the best Black Forrest Cherry Cakes in all of Germany. For reasons known only to her, it was decided that I nedded one. It was the kind of a cake that was so good, it could cause a person to have a stroke.

So I did.

One minute I am sitting at the table eating cake, the next I'm saying "boorhay mitz serkas mohor" which means "my arm is numb and I can't see" in a language that apparently only stroke victims understand. "Well", I thought to myself, "that can't be good". As it turns out, it was good, at least in the way that getting hit by a train is good, as long it doesn't kill you.

"You almost died", said my doctor in not reassuring english. "Your left cardicotic artery is completely blocked, and you need surgery, or maybe not, we're not sure yet". "Nice to meet you too" I said. At least, I think I said that. "Your brain had a cross over" he continued, "the right artery is doing what the left side normally does. You are very lucky".

I was tempted to tell him that my idea of luck, involved eating cake without my head exploding, but I decided to wait on that one. I have the feeling that between German, English and "Stroke Weillian" something would be lost in translation.

So, now I'm stuck here in a German hospital for at least a week, if not more, waiting for a surgery to repair an artery that was according to Herr Doctor damaged by the radiation treatments that saved my live 16 years ago. Such is life.

In the meantime, I'm teaching the nurses english. Or not. It's hard to say at this point. Just when I'm sure "Sabine" has mastered "I shot J.R.", Yvonne gets "I know how to see the tits on the Land 'O Lakes butter princess" hopelesly jumbled.

It's going to be a long week.

JC

JC's wife here: the stroke happened on Monday evening, and luckily he improved a huge amount in the last 2 days. He wrote (and re-wrote) this "story" this morning on a piece of paper and gave it to me to post. As of now his motor skills are normal, his speach and reading is good (he's reading a lot), but for now, he can't spell right at all - it's called Aphasia .... and I am way to exhausted to proof everthing I typed and/or install an english version of spell check on this computer.

Corey · 03-25-2009, 07:39 PM

Damn man, that's awful. Use your god powers and get better quickly. Seen a lot of that shit at the ER this past two weeks that didn't turn out so well.

Trip · 03-25-2009, 07:43 PM

Holy crap, I was wondering where you been. Glad you made it man. Try to keep us updated if you can.

Angee · 03-25-2009, 07:57 PM

Wow...glad you are still with us! Get better soon!!

Librarian · 03-25-2009, 08:02 PM

Check your PMs!

Apoc · 03-25-2009, 08:05 PM

Glad your ok man.

Hope everything works out.

Any cake left?

Porkchop · 03-25-2009, 08:10 PM

Holy shnitkies JC....

Get well, and lay off the cake!

goof2 · 03-26-2009, 06:58 PM

Feel better AMJ. Be glad it was Black Forrest Cherry instead of Death by Chocolate. You'd have been totally screwed.

azoomm · 03-26-2009, 07:33 PM

mmmmmm Cake... fat kids LOVE cake.

What a fantastic group we are. Quite the disfunctional family.

We go from a near death experience to wanting the cake recipe.

Fleck750 · 03-26-2009, 07:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by azoomm

mmmmmm Cake... fat kids LOVE cake.

What a fantastic group we are. Quite the disfunctional family.

We go from a near death experience to wanting the cake recipe.

I'd almost trade the near death experience for some decent Black Forest cake.

It's better than sex...really, I mean that, 100%.

03-25-2009, 07:39 PM	#2
Corey AMA Supersport Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Florida Moto: Not a damn thing Posts: 2,612	Damn man, that's awful. Use your god powers and get better quickly. Seen a lot of that shit at the ER this past two weeks that didn't turn out so well. __________________ Half man, half horse, half motorcycle. All awesome. "Your game is shit, your company is shit. Activision ruined you! Activision ruined you." - Francis

03-25-2009, 08:02 PM	#5
Librarian Helmets Optional Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Massajuices Moto: '85 K100 and a DL650AK9 Posts: 155	Check your PMs! __________________ One man's theology is another man's belly laugh. -- Robert A. Heinlein What's the point of wearing your favorite rocketship underpants if nobody ever asks to see 'em? -- Calvin (Calvin & Hobbes)

03-25-2009, 08:10 PM	#7
Porkchop 125GP Champion Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: Worthington, OH Moto: Empty Garage Posts: 3,418	Holy shnitkies JC.... Get well, and lay off the cake! __________________ *Coming soon? 2010 Ducati Monster 696 - Sold 1984 Honda VF500F - Sold 1999 Yamaha R6 - Sold

03-26-2009, 07:33 PM	#9
azoomm moderator chick Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Hill Country TX Moto: Pasta Rockets Posts: 8,917	mmmmmm Cake... fat kids LOVE cake. What a fantastic group we are. Quite the disfunctional family. We go from a near death experience to wanting the cake recipe. __________________ We have enough youth. How about a fountain of "smart"? Come Play at the Track!! http://www.elitetrackdays.com

03-25-2009, 08:05 PM	#6
Apoc For Science. You Monster. Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Canada Moto: '08 HD FLSTSB Posts: 3,546	Glad your ok man. Hope everything works out. Any cake left?

03-26-2009, 06:58 PM	#8
goof2 AMA Supersport Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 4,756	Feel better AMJ. Be glad it was Black Forrest Cherry instead of Death by Chocolate. You'd have been totally screwed.