Go Back   Two Wheel Fix > General > Off Topic

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 04-17-2008, 06:29 PM   #1
Mr Lefty
TWFix Legend
 
Mr Lefty's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Denver CO
Moto: 01 BMW F650GS Dakar
Posts: 15,677
Default Bad first date?

See if it compares to this

Quote:
If you didn't see this on the Tonight show ~ Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. There was absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize!

She said it was midwinter...Snowing and quite cold... and the guy had taken her skiing in the mountains outside Salt Lake City, Utah . It was a day trip (no overnight). They were strangers, after all, and had never met before.
The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed home late that afternoon.

They were driving back down the mountain, when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that extra latte. They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in the middle of nowhere! Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which she did for a while.
Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going, there came a point where she told him that he had better stop and let her go beside the road, or it would be the front seat of his car .

They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked her pants down and started. In the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so she let her butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself. Her companion stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking. All she could think about was the relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of the situation. Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another sensation.

As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were firmly glued against the car's fender. Thoughts of tongues frozen to poles immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem. Due to the extreme cold, horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the moment, she answered her date's concerns about 'what is taking so long'
with a reply that indeed, she was 'freezing her butt off' and in need of some assistance!

He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater and then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out laughing. She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma. Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced with a real problem. Both agreed it would take something hot to free her chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal!

Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her free. So, as she looked the other way, her first time date proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender.

As the audience screamed in laughter, she took the Tonight Show prize hands down. Or perhaps that should be 'pants down. 'And you thought your first date was embarrassing. Jay Leno's comment...'This gives a whole new meaning to being pissed off.' Oh, and how did the first date turn out? He became her husband and was sitting next to her on the Leno show.
Mr Lefty is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-17-2008, 06:33 PM   #2
t-homo
WSB Champion
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Springfield, MO
Posts: 7,146
Default

That would be embarrassing as hell.
t-homo is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-17-2008, 06:36 PM   #3
Crazy
I'm home take me drunk
 
Crazy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Champaign, IL
Moto: 2005 SV650s blue
Posts: 430
Default

__________________
Memento mori
Crazy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-17-2008, 08:37 PM   #4
upshift
Looing for a bike...
 
upshift's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Moto: Nothing at the moment
Posts: 571
Default

Wow that would suck. It would be one heck of a story to tell the kids/grandkids
upshift is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-18-2008, 01:34 AM   #5
OneSickPsycho
Ride Like an Asshole
 
OneSickPsycho's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Moto: nothing...
Posts: 11,254
Default

Yep, if a chick asked me to piss on her during our first date, I'd marry her too.
OneSickPsycho is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-18-2008, 03:29 AM   #6
Mr Lefty
TWFix Legend
 
Mr Lefty's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Denver CO
Moto: 01 BMW F650GS Dakar
Posts: 15,677
Default

cept this chick said piss on her ass... not IN her ass
Mr Lefty is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-18-2008, 10:18 AM   #7
OneSickPsycho
Ride Like an Asshole
 
OneSickPsycho's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Moto: nothing...
Posts: 11,254
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ebbs15 View Post
cept this chick said piss on her ass... not IN her ass
It's coolio... As long as I get to piss on her... I'd probably fuck around and get some in her hair...
OneSickPsycho is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-18-2008, 10:31 AM   #8
Rider
Moto GP Star
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 12,156
Default

Thats crazy...
Rider is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-18-2008, 01:32 PM   #9
comonboys
Ridin Naked. HMMMMM......
 
comonboys's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Davenport, ND
Moto: 650 SV
Posts: 461
Default

OOOOO good lord.... O my.... That would suck so bad.
comonboys is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 05:56 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions Inc.