07-30-2009, 12:50 PM | #1 |
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Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Sydney
Moto: '98 Honda Fireblade
Posts: 3,696
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Dumb Joke Thursday?
Jesus and Satan were having an on-going argument about who was better
on the computer. They had been going at it for days, and frankly God was tired of hearing all the bickering. Finally fed up, God said, 'THAT'S IT! I have had enough. I am going to set up a test that will run for two hours, and from those results, I will judge who does the better job.' So Satan and Jesus sat down at the keyboards and typed away. They moused. They faxed. They e-mailed. They e-mailed with attachments. They downloaded. They did spreadsheets! They wrote reports. They created labels and cards. They created charts and graphs. They did some genealogy reports They did every job known to man. Jesus worked with heavenly efficiency and Satan was faster than hell. Then, ten minutes before their time was up, lightning suddenly flashed across the sky, thunder rolled, rain poured, and, of course, the power went off. Satan stared at his blank screen and screamed every curse word known in the underworld!!!! Jesus just sighed........... Finally the electricity came back on, and each of them restarted their computers. Satan started searching frantically, screaming: 'It's gone! It's all GONE! 'I lost everything when the power went out!' Meanwhile, Jesus quietly started printing out all of his files from the past two hours of work. Satan observed this and became irate. 'Wait!' he screamed. 'That's not fair! He cheated! How come he has all his work and I don't have any?' God just shrugged and said, JESUS SAVES! |
07-30-2009, 02:44 PM | #2 |
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Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Central NY
Moto: 2003 SV650S
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old but still funny
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I'm not "fat." I'm "Enlarged to show texture." Handle every stressful situation like a DOG: If you can't eat it or hump it, pi$$ on it & walk away. |
08-02-2009, 08:05 PM | #3 |
For Science. You Monster.
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Canada
Moto: '08 HD FLSTSB
Posts: 3,546
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A dying woman decides to tell her husband she'd been unfaithful. She said she had put an ear of corn in her lock-chest everytime she'd cheated, and she wanted him to open it.
The man opens it and see's 3 ears of corn and 100000$. Since his wife was dying, he decided to forgive her, but just had to ask where the 100000$ came from... "Oh", she replied, "everytime I got a dozen a corn, I sold them.' |
08-03-2009, 11:33 AM | #4 |
Let go of my ears.
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Jacksonville, FL
Moto: '03 GSX-R600, '04 625SMC
Posts: 1,394
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What do you call a Psychic midget that has escaped from prison?
a small medium at large!
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Entia non sunt multiplicanda necessitatem |
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